I'm feeling a bit like I'm drowning again.
I think it's from the list of stuff on hold for the moment, and money. (and my own failings at things but anyway)
My wrist has been bothering me a good deal lately. Not enough to say it's in pain, but it is stiff and I'm not taking care of it well. For a while I blamed holding my phone since I had gotten a new phone game and been holding it in my right hand and stuff. I'm sure it has not helped, but I think also using the laptop touchpad is also a cause. The combination between using the two has strained my wrist. It's just bothersome at all.
I've moved to using my laptop only for the most part is because my desktop will just randomly crash. It can have just started up and crash within 10 minutes, or I'll have spent hours playing games or doing other things and then it's fine? There's no single cause I can figure out why it's crashing, and when I manage to get a glimpse of the BSOD for the 2 seconds it's on screen, the error message changes. Some errors appear with frequency, but others I've only seen a few times. It's a different thing each time. Any solution I've tried as clearly not worked. So I've stopped using my desktop frequently. The laptop is fine for general surfing, and I had been doing (some) unity work on it, but above, wrist issue with the touchpad. I don't have a good set up that I can use a mouse with the laptop with ease, so I've stopped using a mouse with it too. I want my desktop to stop crashing so I can use photoshop, or do anything with it without worry. It probably needs the mother board replaced.
I have been trying to do more art, and I'm glad for the discord channel I'm in (even if the previous one was more active) but also started slacking on that even. I bring out what I want to use to the coffee table in the living room, which is half taken up by my laptop, and cups and well, everything. It's the only table out here. I can't really work on things that will need actual space. It's not that bad actually. I enjoy the items I use, but I have to always pack them up when I'm going to eat or something. I think that's a bit frustrating too. All my art supplies jumbled in a box I have to dig through to find anything. I hope to get that remedied soon though, so it'll be easier to find whatever I want to use.
Related, sewing! I want to sew more! I've fallen in love with some plushie patterns, since they are small and if I truly hate the result, I can probably give it away to someone. I want to do cloths, but my sewing "desk" is also just a coffee table. Trying to sew larger pieces is a pain. That's why I moved on to the plushies! Minky fabric though, a great fabric for soft cuddly animals, is $12/yard. I don't feel like I'm ready for that as expensive of fabric yet, but I managed to find some for 6-8 a yard. I want to sew this next plushie, but I'm leaving in a week for a week, and don't want to leave the room a mess while I'm gone. It's relatively cleaned up right now, so I want to leave it that way. However I think I'm itching to make something, so trying to hold myself back feels terrible.
Money! Hubs had taken a week+ vacation with his dad and a friend of his, which we ended up spending a lot of money for. He also built a new comptuer (for gaming and game design). These combined has maxed out credit cards, one of them I had even paid off!!! So I feel a bit frustrated with that. Seeing the hard work of getting them paid off to be blasted out of the water. He's getting a bonus for a new hire, and when that comes through it'll help pay off at least one, maybe two of the cards. But it's a bit hard to tell how much of the money we'll actually get when it's taxed. We did our taxes, and apparently my theater job didn't pay income tax. WTF? So we end up owing money. Like 476. It really blows. Also just paid yearly tags for the bike and hubs new truck. All these tings all over the place! I want to cry and throw a fit! When I get back from my trip, hopefully all these things will stop. Well, after we get the mobo. And probably another thing or three ><
We've also agreed to start eating better and to get into shape. Hubs had come back with a cold so we're recovering from that before trying to do get back into the workout portion. But we've been working on the diet portion. I feel like I've been failing at it though, with a few chai lattes in the past week. I'm not sure what is "good" food and what is "bad" food.
I feel pretty good socially though; there had been a lot I had gone to when Hubs was out of town, to help keep sanity, and I don't really see much of a reaosn why that will really stop. I think it's at once a week at this moment, and I think that's good. I don't feel terrible about that.
There's just a lot I want to deal with, but just feel like I can't deal with, just yet. and the waiting is kind of killing me.